Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The long weekend is never long enough...

Wow, some great lessons learned over the last 7 days....

Last week was super crazy!  My class this year had a final "end of the year" trip planned to Triple Play - an indoor water park, arcade, mini golf, etc. to celebrate the end of the year.  Well, since our year wrapped up early, it was more like a "class reunion" rather than end of the year celebration! 

However, I gave myself "permission" to just have fun - ie have any/all junk food I wanted.  BIG MISTAKE!  Frankly, I didn't each MUCH, but what I did were bad choices (and all my old "vices"): soda, a bit of candy, fritos with chilli & cheese, etc., etc.  OH MY GOSH!  I paid for that for TWO DAYS while it all worked out of my system.  That was on Thursday, and I noticed on my run on Sunday I was STILL paying for it (sluggish, out of breath, etc.).  Won't do that again - PROMISE!

Yesterday was Memorial Day, and we hummed and hahed about what to do.  Dan really wanted to finish the other side of the garage roof (we already repaired the side that had the leak).  And I know that he really wanted to just say "IT'S DONE!" but his family really wanted him to head up past Grangeville (as per Kinnick Memorial tradition) for "day camping."  The rest of the Kinnick clan actually CAMPS, but since my dear hubby works all weekend, we only go up and "day camp" on Monday.

So we did....

It was great to get away, exhausting because of the great mountain air, sunshine and as with any family gathering, emotional overload.  (Everything from the kids acting up to being compared to the ex wife.)  But once the kids settled down, shot a few rounds (yes, I do mean bullets) and everyone roasted a few weenies, it was good.

Although I had to admit, once I got the camp fire smell showered off (I do love that smell), and layed in bed, I had a few tears flowing from my eyes.  (I've perfected the art of silent crying, as to not disturb my hubby with my emotional overload.)  The comments - although forgiven - hurt.  I wanted to shoot the gun too, but then didn't want it to be a competition (like everything else turns in to) because I'm a beginner and suck at shooting.  (I'm right handed, and want to shoot right handed with my left eye...which is WRONG.)  I'm used to being good at the things I do.  I don't mind being "bad" at shooting - I know I need to learn and practice, but I don't want the jeers of competition while I'm doing it....

And then hubby mentions taking the kids camping this summer because he knows I have to work.... THAT hurt.  More than the ex-comparison, more than anything else.  I don't want to keep my family from having a fun time, but I want to be there too.  There's no "right answer" to this solution.  And oh - by the way..... that's some thing that also happened with the ex a lot - Dan and the kids would go camping a lot without her because she (frankly) didn't like camping and was "too busy" to go.   I LIKE camping and I HAVE to work since I make a piddly income.  What to do???

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