It's Sunday, and contrary to popular belief that I should sleep in, my body doesn't agree with me. IN FACT - we go to the 11:15 am church service so that we can have a relatively low-key, low-stress morning! (Which we never have Monday - Friday!) But apparently from 6:45 - 7:05 when my body had it's eyes open, staring at the ceiling, it was clearly time to get up. Lucky me.
However, all is not upsetting, I was able to get my blog done from the night before and posted (day 41), and think about the day ahead, as well as the week before me. And set myself up for SUCCESS!
First (today): I always have a mental "to do" list going - ESPECIALLY on the weekends! So much that I want to cram into that little bit of time! I need to work on my little mini-scrapbook that I'm giving my hubby for Valentine's day (more on that holiday later), and make cookies for him for the following week. I also need to (groan) start our taxes. Not too excited about that one....
Next (this week): The Princess is gracing us with her presence Mon - Wed, as normal (per the parenting plan). Apparently, this 1-day a week crap didn't pan out like the ex thought it would (shock, surprise) and so our (hubby & my) opinion is to basically just tell her to buck up and deal with it! This is our life - as is. We're not dancing around you (or anyone else). We will HELP you get used to this situation, but we are not going to make special accomodations for you so that you can turn around and continue your bratty ways. The end.
But that also means that her day to cook dinner (each one of our kids has a night during the week) is Tuesday. V-day. Glorious! Ironically, the dish she wants to make is one that my hubby made for me on our very first date! (insert "AW!" here...lol) I just hope she doesn't poison me/us. Originally, we were going to go out with every other couple in the L-C valley, but I refuse to leave the Princess here in our house without an adult. Nope, sorry, not happening. We'll just have to make V-day plans another day, which is ok with me.
Workouts:
Turbo Jam with 2 lb weights - 20 min, 119 calories
Turbo Sculpt (too slow for me...didn't care for it) - 10 min, 75 cal
Treadmill - 48 min, 455 calories
total cals burned: 649 calories
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories consumed: 1557 NUTS! Over by 7 calories!!!
Monday, February 13, 2012
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Day 41 - this weather matches my mood
It's Saturday. *sigh* Usually that's the wonderful feeling of sleeping in, and a bit more relaxing than most days. But instead I woke up bright and early with both ears throbbing on the inside. I've been feeling a head cold coming on, but when it hits my ears, I'm a gonner. My ears are so sensitive after years and years of ear infections as a kid. So I put some homeopathic ear drops in them and hope for the best...I really hope it's just a cold, and I don't have to go in. We're still "new" to this area, and I don't have a doctor or anything like that established here. (Don't we always leave those things until the last minute?? Urg.)
On a more positive note, the scale IS moving in the right direction, although frankly, I don't know WHY or HOW! I'm down now to 193.8. It's not a lot from last week, and the only thing I can think of is that I'm truly more consistant. HA - CONSISTANTLY UP AND DOWN! lol.... No, seriously, I know that I've had some high days calorically, but OVERALL, my exercise and eating habits are becoming more consistant. I'm also noticing that I'm trying to make "the BETTER choice." For example, we were at Panda Express last night, and instead of rice and chow mein, I got the mixed veggies (which were actually pretty good!). And for my entrees, I got one "not so good" (the honey walnut shrimp...I just LOVE shrimp!!!) and the brocolli beef. NOT ONLY THAT, but I only ate the veggies, 1/2 of the entrees and left the REST for my son (who was at a basketball game for band last night). YAY! I stopped when I was full - and TRUST ME - I could have (and would normally have) kept going.
Or even last week when we went to Arby's for lunch - instead of the melty, velveta-ish cheese concoction they have, I chose a Market Fresh sandwich. Ok, GRANTED - I didn't pick the salad. I looked over, and there were 3 ladies (on a work lunch break?) and all 3 of them had really healthy salads. But not only did the salads looky icky, I'm just really not a salad-salad type of person. I'd rather make my own at home. But I made a BETTER choice. It's certainly a step in the right direction.
...later...
Well, I headed downstairs for my treadmill. It's seen quite a few miles, a couple 1/2 marathons and training on it...I really would like to get a new one... But for $75 on Craigslist 2 1/2 years ago and an $80 new belt she's seen me through some miles! But once we get a lot of debt paid off, I'd really like to get a new one.
ANYWAY....(sorry for the tangent)....Once I got on the ol' 'mill, I was feeling pretty good. Instead of speed drills today, I wanted to focus on my 4 minute segments of jogging. I usually fast-walk for awhile, then jog for 4 min. at about 4.1/4.2 I'm not a speedy jogger. However, there were segments today where I either jogged for 6 minutes straight (one time for 8 min!) or had it pumped up to 4.3/4.4 during the 4 minutes. On top of all that, endurance-wise, I went for 75 minutes today! (The extra 15 min. noted below was a bit of strength training afterwards as well as cool-down stretching.) I feel really good about that. I think I need to find some races in my area to keep me towards a goal because I'm "training" right now for nothing. Just doing health-focused "training," I guess. And that's ok too. I don't want to train for any long endurance races...not just yet. Not only do I really have to watch my eating differently (and eat for running calories, not eat for losing weight...which is NOT the same thing), but training for a half marathon can be all consuming. Not quite ready for that again....at least NOT YET. I want to get a good portion of weight off - taking 180+ lbs over 13.1 miles at one time is NOT fun for my body. Yes, an accomplishment, but I don't want to KILL my body.
Workout:
Treadmill: 90 min, 754 CALORIES! OH YEAH! :D
I was so pumped to see that I made my weekly fitness goal (of burning 2,100 calories/week)! With my "off" days and being in a funk all week, I just really wasn't sure I'd pull it off, and was willing to work that much harder this next week to make it up.
Nutrition-wise, I keep forgetting my Shakeology! Urg! I don't know what my deal is (really)! Maybe I just need to start having it for breakfast, that way I don't forget it during the day.
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories consumed: 1366 That's even with tortilla chips and salsa for snack! YUM! ;-)
On a more positive note, the scale IS moving in the right direction, although frankly, I don't know WHY or HOW! I'm down now to 193.8. It's not a lot from last week, and the only thing I can think of is that I'm truly more consistant. HA - CONSISTANTLY UP AND DOWN! lol.... No, seriously, I know that I've had some high days calorically, but OVERALL, my exercise and eating habits are becoming more consistant. I'm also noticing that I'm trying to make "the BETTER choice." For example, we were at Panda Express last night, and instead of rice and chow mein, I got the mixed veggies (which were actually pretty good!). And for my entrees, I got one "not so good" (the honey walnut shrimp...I just LOVE shrimp!!!) and the brocolli beef. NOT ONLY THAT, but I only ate the veggies, 1/2 of the entrees and left the REST for my son (who was at a basketball game for band last night). YAY! I stopped when I was full - and TRUST ME - I could have (and would normally have) kept going.
Or even last week when we went to Arby's for lunch - instead of the melty, velveta-ish cheese concoction they have, I chose a Market Fresh sandwich. Ok, GRANTED - I didn't pick the salad. I looked over, and there were 3 ladies (on a work lunch break?) and all 3 of them had really healthy salads. But not only did the salads looky icky, I'm just really not a salad-salad type of person. I'd rather make my own at home. But I made a BETTER choice. It's certainly a step in the right direction.
...later...
Well, I headed downstairs for my treadmill. It's seen quite a few miles, a couple 1/2 marathons and training on it...I really would like to get a new one... But for $75 on Craigslist 2 1/2 years ago and an $80 new belt she's seen me through some miles! But once we get a lot of debt paid off, I'd really like to get a new one.
ANYWAY....(sorry for the tangent)....Once I got on the ol' 'mill, I was feeling pretty good. Instead of speed drills today, I wanted to focus on my 4 minute segments of jogging. I usually fast-walk for awhile, then jog for 4 min. at about 4.1/4.2 I'm not a speedy jogger. However, there were segments today where I either jogged for 6 minutes straight (one time for 8 min!) or had it pumped up to 4.3/4.4 during the 4 minutes. On top of all that, endurance-wise, I went for 75 minutes today! (The extra 15 min. noted below was a bit of strength training afterwards as well as cool-down stretching.) I feel really good about that. I think I need to find some races in my area to keep me towards a goal because I'm "training" right now for nothing. Just doing health-focused "training," I guess. And that's ok too. I don't want to train for any long endurance races...not just yet. Not only do I really have to watch my eating differently (and eat for running calories, not eat for losing weight...which is NOT the same thing), but training for a half marathon can be all consuming. Not quite ready for that again....at least NOT YET. I want to get a good portion of weight off - taking 180+ lbs over 13.1 miles at one time is NOT fun for my body. Yes, an accomplishment, but I don't want to KILL my body.
Workout:
Treadmill: 90 min, 754 CALORIES! OH YEAH! :D
I was so pumped to see that I made my weekly fitness goal (of burning 2,100 calories/week)! With my "off" days and being in a funk all week, I just really wasn't sure I'd pull it off, and was willing to work that much harder this next week to make it up.
Nutrition-wise, I keep forgetting my Shakeology! Urg! I don't know what my deal is (really)! Maybe I just need to start having it for breakfast, that way I don't forget it during the day.
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories consumed: 1366 That's even with tortilla chips and salsa for snack! YUM! ;-)
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Day 40 - TGIF
...Morning...
I woke up to my alarm, and went right back to bed. Yep, I made a conscious decision to go back to bed. I know to meet my weekly goal, I really need to burn over 800 calories. Between today and tomorrow, that's a good 400 calories a day. I usually hit 350 on a GOOD week day, and 400 is doable for a weekend. WHY did I sleep in? Frankly, it's an "eh" day. The weather is crappy, I didn't sleep well and my gut's up & down (probably from Arby's lunch yesterday...why do I go out? Oh yeah - to eat with hubby). So I have to at least walk at recesses today - rain or shine. Oh joy.
Frankly, I just don't wanna.
I'm in a funk. Exercise-wise, that's not like me. I try to make exercise fun because I know if it's "fun," I look forward to doing it, and I WILL do it. I've got a million DVDs from Jillian Michaels, to Bob Harper, Tony, Turbo Jam, etc., etc. I have a treadmill and free hand weights and a step. It's not about the lack of variety. It's me. Oi.
...Afternoon...
Ok. Still in a funk. Check out what I've eaten today, this should just make your head shake, and frankly, your body shudder:
No breakfast (not usually like me), unless you count hot tea.
AM Snack - most of my Chocolate Shakeology (with almond milk)
Lunch - I WANT SWEETS! I WANT SALT!
Had 2 Charelston Chews and BBQ Stackers (like Pringles) chips. ...and a soda... :-( Broke my no-soda streak. However, I didn't even finish 1/2 of the Coke Zero. It didn't taste like I imagined, which is good, right? Actually, it's SO sad....
No PM snack. (probably for the best...)
Sadly (and ironically) I still have enough calories left for a small dinner. Just doesn't seem right (or possible). But my hubby isn't feeling too great tonight, so I'm thinking that maybe a little soup is on the menu for tonight, which should be just fine.
As for exercise, I DID walk at last recess - I was running errands at lunch recess, but after I go home from work tonight, I plan to get my booty moving. I gotta do SOMETHING...I'm hoping that will not only help me feel better, but get my head straightened out.
...evening...
Well, I got home and had to deal with a situation with my son, so there went my workout! By the time I finished with him, hubby was due to be home. And hubby wasn't doing so well - he's been fighting a stress headache all day. :-( He's one of those introverts to internalizes everything. So my evening was spent trying to help him relax. I took him to Panda Express (which he said he had wanted to try, but never had eaten there), had him take a warm shower, and gave him a nice back massage with oil. He was snoring before I turned out the lights. Poor guy!
Anyway, at Panda Express I knew I didn't have a lot of calories left, and I am proud of myself because I didn't just think "Oh well, I didn't make (calorie) goal today, so who cares?!?" and eat all tempura crap! Nope! I had mixed veggies and brocolli beef and I DID have some honey walnut shrimp - but NOT a lot! YAY me! Yes, I did go over my calorie count, but I feel that I ended the day with a victory as opposed to how my mid-day was earlier.
Workout:
Recess: 19 min, only 119 calories. Urg.
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Consumed: 1,779 urg.
All I can say is that I'm human. This is a JOURNEY. I'm going to have ups and downs. I've been fighting my "food battle" all my life, frankly, allowing my feelings to torment me, and choose what goes in my mouth. I'm working hard to control it, and through the grace of God one day it will be easier.
I woke up to my alarm, and went right back to bed. Yep, I made a conscious decision to go back to bed. I know to meet my weekly goal, I really need to burn over 800 calories. Between today and tomorrow, that's a good 400 calories a day. I usually hit 350 on a GOOD week day, and 400 is doable for a weekend. WHY did I sleep in? Frankly, it's an "eh" day. The weather is crappy, I didn't sleep well and my gut's up & down (probably from Arby's lunch yesterday...why do I go out? Oh yeah - to eat with hubby). So I have to at least walk at recesses today - rain or shine. Oh joy.
Frankly, I just don't wanna.
I'm in a funk. Exercise-wise, that's not like me. I try to make exercise fun because I know if it's "fun," I look forward to doing it, and I WILL do it. I've got a million DVDs from Jillian Michaels, to Bob Harper, Tony, Turbo Jam, etc., etc. I have a treadmill and free hand weights and a step. It's not about the lack of variety. It's me. Oi.
...Afternoon...
Ok. Still in a funk. Check out what I've eaten today, this should just make your head shake, and frankly, your body shudder:
No breakfast (not usually like me), unless you count hot tea.
AM Snack - most of my Chocolate Shakeology (with almond milk)
Lunch - I WANT SWEETS! I WANT SALT!
Had 2 Charelston Chews and BBQ Stackers (like Pringles) chips. ...and a soda... :-( Broke my no-soda streak. However, I didn't even finish 1/2 of the Coke Zero. It didn't taste like I imagined, which is good, right? Actually, it's SO sad....
No PM snack. (probably for the best...)
Sadly (and ironically) I still have enough calories left for a small dinner. Just doesn't seem right (or possible). But my hubby isn't feeling too great tonight, so I'm thinking that maybe a little soup is on the menu for tonight, which should be just fine.
As for exercise, I DID walk at last recess - I was running errands at lunch recess, but after I go home from work tonight, I plan to get my booty moving. I gotta do SOMETHING...I'm hoping that will not only help me feel better, but get my head straightened out.
...evening...
Well, I got home and had to deal with a situation with my son, so there went my workout! By the time I finished with him, hubby was due to be home. And hubby wasn't doing so well - he's been fighting a stress headache all day. :-( He's one of those introverts to internalizes everything. So my evening was spent trying to help him relax. I took him to Panda Express (which he said he had wanted to try, but never had eaten there), had him take a warm shower, and gave him a nice back massage with oil. He was snoring before I turned out the lights. Poor guy!
Anyway, at Panda Express I knew I didn't have a lot of calories left, and I am proud of myself because I didn't just think "Oh well, I didn't make (calorie) goal today, so who cares?!?" and eat all tempura crap! Nope! I had mixed veggies and brocolli beef and I DID have some honey walnut shrimp - but NOT a lot! YAY me! Yes, I did go over my calorie count, but I feel that I ended the day with a victory as opposed to how my mid-day was earlier.
Workout:
Recess: 19 min, only 119 calories. Urg.
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Consumed: 1,779 urg.
All I can say is that I'm human. This is a JOURNEY. I'm going to have ups and downs. I've been fighting my "food battle" all my life, frankly, allowing my feelings to torment me, and choose what goes in my mouth. I'm working hard to control it, and through the grace of God one day it will be easier.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Day 39
Workout:
None...
Nutrition:
none....
Ok. Let's just say it was an off day all the way around. I hit my caloric limit by lunchtime...oops. A BIG OOPS! So tomorrow is a new day...
None...
Nutrition:
none....
Ok. Let's just say it was an off day all the way around. I hit my caloric limit by lunchtime...oops. A BIG OOPS! So tomorrow is a new day...
Day 38...whew!
Well, my hubby asked me to come home like "normal" instead of avoiding the Princess for hours upon hours. And since I choose to honor him over his ex wife and daughter's requests (and even my own feelings for wanting to avoid the Princess), I came home. It was a good thing too, because the ex thought she was going into labor, and so the kids ended up staying the night!
Overall, it went well. The Princess was still her snarky self, but dealing with her for only 1 day vs. 3 is better!
However, I didn't want to eat most of the day, and so my calories were significantly lower than normal. I even ate a left over biscuit from the night before to get another 150 cals in!
Workout:
Treadmill - 43 min, 338 cals
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories consumed: 1129
Overall, it went well. The Princess was still her snarky self, but dealing with her for only 1 day vs. 3 is better!
However, I didn't want to eat most of the day, and so my calories were significantly lower than normal. I even ate a left over biscuit from the night before to get another 150 cals in!
Workout:
Treadmill - 43 min, 338 cals
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories consumed: 1129
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Day 37 - avoiding drama...
Well, it's only Tuesday, but my mind is already focused on tomorrow (ONE DAY AT A TIME)! "The Princess" (as I've privately dubbed my step-daughter) will be making her presence tomorrow. I don't truly understand the thought behind her mother's maddness.... The Princess wants MORE time with her dad, yet, she gets to come LESS during the week??? Honestly, her mom said The Princess is "on the verge of blowing up" and she's afraid that depending on what happens, I may call the cops on her (i.e. physical harm towards anyone in my house). YOU BETCHA! I'm sorry, I'm a tough-love parent, and I would MUCH rather call the cops on a 13 year old, learn the lesson early than to have her blow up at age 23 at work because she never learned how to control her actions, etc.
Anyway....so I'm really trying not to dwell on it, but I have to figure out what I'm going to be doing for the 4 hours that I'm off of work, but she's in my home. My husband does not like the idea that I'm being "chased" out of my own home. But I have told him that this is MY choice.... My goal is that she will see that whether or not I'm here (physically), life is still going to be the same. But I have a feeling that will backfire. He already has plans to take her to the garage and help her build her shelf...and she wanted Japanese for dinner this week, so instead of having it TONIGHT, he asked me if I can move it to TOMORROW for when she comes.... (see why I call her "The Princess?") So I'm sure she will get (to some degree) the "royal treatment" (excuse the pun). So why excuse myself from the house? SO I DON'T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH HER! Frankly, I have a feeling if I were here, I'd be sick from disgust. :-/
So what does this have to do with my weight loss journey?
This is the stress that I can't get away from. I know this stress is working completely against my weight loss. Not only does it trigger those "gotta have something sweet" cravings, but it sends my cortisol levels through the roof! (Why am I letting her affect me so much??)I'm already planning to bring a Yoga DVD with me to work tomorrow so that I can do it after work. But we're on a pretty tight budget, so it's not like I can go out and do my nails, or go out to dinner....Maybe $5 footlong Subway, though? :0)
Workouts:
Treadmill: 50 min, 428 calories
Ok...I know I went over my calories for the day. But let me tell you, we had a GRUBBIN' dinner! I made a Spinach/Mushroom Lasagne from my Runner's World Magazine. Oh, YUM! But what put me over wasn't the Lasagne (which was pretty healthy), but the Red Lobster Cheddar Biscuits that I made with it. Oops.... Worth the extra workout? YOU BETCHA! Gotta still live.
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories Consumed: 1761 (oops)
Anyway....so I'm really trying not to dwell on it, but I have to figure out what I'm going to be doing for the 4 hours that I'm off of work, but she's in my home. My husband does not like the idea that I'm being "chased" out of my own home. But I have told him that this is MY choice.... My goal is that she will see that whether or not I'm here (physically), life is still going to be the same. But I have a feeling that will backfire. He already has plans to take her to the garage and help her build her shelf...and she wanted Japanese for dinner this week, so instead of having it TONIGHT, he asked me if I can move it to TOMORROW for when she comes.... (see why I call her "The Princess?") So I'm sure she will get (to some degree) the "royal treatment" (excuse the pun). So why excuse myself from the house? SO I DON'T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH HER! Frankly, I have a feeling if I were here, I'd be sick from disgust. :-/
So what does this have to do with my weight loss journey?
This is the stress that I can't get away from. I know this stress is working completely against my weight loss. Not only does it trigger those "gotta have something sweet" cravings, but it sends my cortisol levels through the roof! (Why am I letting her affect me so much??)I'm already planning to bring a Yoga DVD with me to work tomorrow so that I can do it after work. But we're on a pretty tight budget, so it's not like I can go out and do my nails, or go out to dinner....Maybe $5 footlong Subway, though? :0)
Workouts:
Treadmill: 50 min, 428 calories
Ok...I know I went over my calories for the day. But let me tell you, we had a GRUBBIN' dinner! I made a Spinach/Mushroom Lasagne from my Runner's World Magazine. Oh, YUM! But what put me over wasn't the Lasagne (which was pretty healthy), but the Red Lobster Cheddar Biscuits that I made with it. Oops.... Worth the extra workout? YOU BETCHA! Gotta still live.
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550
Calories Consumed: 1761 (oops)
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Day 36 - Still recovering!
This morning my gut is still rolling from the lesson that I learned at the Super Bowl party yesterday afternoon. Yuck. I think Ginger and Peppermint teas are going to be my best friends today!
...later...
As the day went on, I started feeling a bit better. Lunch was still pretty "eh", but soup helped, and I was able to walk around at recess to burn a few calories. My husband is working Mon-Wed this week (for inventory), so it's really odd to not be doing lunch with him, but caloric-wise, it's VERY helpful! Not only that, but I'm able to walk not only at last recess (which I do "duty" for), but lunch recess as well (20-30 min depending on when I finish my own lunch)! But I DO miss him... :-(
Workout:
Recess walking: 38 min (total), 242 calories
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550 calories
Calories consumed: 1,317 YAY!
...later...
As the day went on, I started feeling a bit better. Lunch was still pretty "eh", but soup helped, and I was able to walk around at recess to burn a few calories. My husband is working Mon-Wed this week (for inventory), so it's really odd to not be doing lunch with him, but caloric-wise, it's VERY helpful! Not only that, but I'm able to walk not only at last recess (which I do "duty" for), but lunch recess as well (20-30 min depending on when I finish my own lunch)! But I DO miss him... :-(
Workout:
Recess walking: 38 min (total), 242 calories
Nutrition:
Goal: 1,200 - 1,550 calories
Calories consumed: 1,317 YAY!
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